ARCHIVES - MAY 2005 TO OCTOBER 2005
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NATTY
BUMPPO, EUCHRE SPRUIKER
Quirky Kentucky counsel, Natty Bumppo, loves playing euchre after church
on Sundays. He's a world authority on that once-popular card game, and
has written a book on it. "Euchre is a poor man's bridge," Natty
declares. "Bridge is for discerners. Chess is for discerners. Euchre is
for drunken slobs who think they know what they are doing." Read
about Natty's life and book by clicking on
BUMPPO. 0510
FOUND!
AUTHOR OF THE MAN AND HIS DOG
Eureka! Thanks to one of our readers, we've discovered who wrote the
usually anonymous story about the man and his dog wanting to enter
Heaven, that has delighted readers around the world for more than 40
years. He's Earl Hamner, who later achieved fame as creator and narrator
of the Emmy Award-winning series The Waltons, the long-running TV
show that millions of viewers around the world have enjoyed for a
quarter-century. To read about the talented writer, now 82, who has
just completed a tour of Virginian and Californian bookstores, click on
EARL HAMNER. 0510
WE
MAY YET BECOME A BANANA REPUBLIC!
Paul Keating's memorable 1986 warning that Australia might become a
banana republic may yet be proved literally correct. At a time when the
price of mineral oil fuel has rocketed to a record level, there's talk
in Queensland of vehicles being powered by fuel made from bananas, while
in South Australia a company is promoting the idea of making paper from
the trunks of banana trees. To read more, click on
BANANA REPUBLIC.
0510
SUN-HERALD
STAFF MAROONED
The Sun-Herald faced a desperate crisis last month. Power was cut off,
mobile phones didn't work, and many of the staff were unable to return
home. The paper's website said: "Sun-Herald employees: Call
1-800-346-2472 to let us know where you are." No, it wasn't in Sydney,
but in Biloxi, Mississippi, one of only four places in the world with a
newspaper called the Sun-Herald. To read how the newspaper survived
in the devastated city, click on
HURRICANE KATRINA. 0510
WELL,
BUTTER MY BUTT AND CALL ME...
"Well, butter my butt and call me a biscuit!" a surprised Dolly Parton once
exclaimed. That's almost as comical as that other phrase, "Slap
my ass and call me Sally," which we discussed in February. Scott
Wright, editor of The Post, in Centre, Alabama has posted a hilarious
collection of southern phrases written by contributing editor Tim Sanders.
Enjoy them by clicking on
Well,
Butter My Armpit and Call Me a Hamster. 0510
YOU
COULD CALL THIS A JAKE HAMMER
Thirteen years ago, Jake Tyson, an 18-year-old apprentice carpenter in
Sydney, Australia, found that his hammer didn't hit nails very
effectively (yet they say a good workman never blames his tools) and the
reverberations sent uncomfortable shocks up his arm. So he set out to
design a better hammer. You can read how he achieved success and won
a top US award, by clicking on
JAKE'S HAMMER. 0510
WOMBATS
AND ROOS GET GREAT REVIEWS
Young American children will learn about Australia's kangaroos and
wombats when their parents or grandparents read them a delightful book
released on October 1. Written by Sallie O'Donnell, a 76-year-old
Florida grandmother and former teacher, Animals, Vegetables And Minerals
- From A to Z links an animal and a nutritional concept to each letter
of the alphabet, in a four-line verse. To read more about this new
book, and see its colorful cover, click on
ANIMALS. 0510
SUDDENLY
SENIOR JOINS GRAYPOW NETWORK
To our great delight, Frank Kaiser's hugely popular US weekly webzine
Suddenly Senior has joined our Graypow Network of outstanding web sites
catering for the over-50s. According to a Retired.com reviewer,
"Kaiser's the Andy Rooney of the Internet, combining knee-slapping humor
with useful information and genuine compassion." To enjoy Frank's
latest jokes, click on
SUDDENLY SENIOR. 0510
IS
GOLDFISH RACING CRUEL?
The latest craze in the Wild West of the United States is goldfish
racing, held in Arizona and Utah bars, and more recently on the east
coast in Florida. Goldfish race in narrow troughs, hurried along by jets
of water squirted at them by noisy drinkers in various states of
sobriety. Would the goldfish prefer to spend their days circling
aimlessly inside small glass bowls? Before answering this difficult
question, read more about these races by clicking on
GOLDFISH. 0509
WHY
WE FORWARD JOKES TO OUR FRIENDS
Warren Bonner, a retired Orange, California businessman and former
webzine editor, has urged thousands of internet surfers around the world
to send their friends a sentimental story about a man and his dog
wanting to enter Heaven. Many have followed his advice, but he has
received virtually no credit for his contribution to global harmony.
Read about this anonymous writer, by clicking on
WARREN BONNER. 0509
PIZZAS
FROM HEAVEN IN HAVANA
We first read about Pizzas from Heaven in an interesting story published
a year ago in the Burlington Free Press, about impressions a
group of US university students had gained from visiting Cuba. Their
tour was arranged by Dr. Lynne Bond, a psychology professor at the
University of Vermont. Read the details, and see great photos of a
novel pizza delivery service, by clicking on
PIZZAS. 0509
OLD-TIME
JOURNOS: "BLOOD, BOOZE, BANDITS"
Still active at 91, Canadian newsman Gwyn "Jocko" Thomas must be one of
the last of the English-speaking newspaper world's old-time police
roundsmen. He sounds very much like several I worked with on Sydney and
Brisbane dailies in the 1930s and '40s. They were hard-working,
hard-drinking, chain-smoking and constantly-swearing tough guys who were
on friendly terms with both cops and crims. To read more about Jocko,
click on POLICE ROUNDS. 0509
BORF,
KILROY, BANKSY AND MANHOLES
Kentucky attorney Natty Bumppo was interested to read about the BORF
graffiti decorating/disfiguring Washington DC, which we wrote about last
month. He claims his second wife invented the name Borf. To read this
and other emails, click on
FEEDBACK. 0509
GRAYPOW'S
TWO NEW ASSOCIATES
Our global network for senior citizens, Graypow, goes from strength to
strength. We warmly welcome the UK webzine Open Writing and the
Canadian website FeelGood Stories. If you'd like to read several
new and interesting stories every day, you'll enjoy visiting Peter
Hinchliffe's
Open Writing website. It offers a feast of words from regular
columnists, U3A [University of Third Age] writers, and other authors.
And from her home near Toronto,
FeelGoodStories' founder, warmhearted French-Canadian Marie
Svistunovs, offers inspirational tales and poems, and interviews about
success and good deeds. 0509
RARE
STAMPS: SYDNEY'S NUDE OLYMPICS
Five years after the Sydney 2000 Olympics, we've discovered a series of
20 rare stamps showing nude athletes participating in those events. To
the deep regret of the world's millions of philatelists, the stamps
can't be used for postage, and the athletes aren't real either. To
read about these artistic stamps, and view them too, click on
ARTISTAMPS.
0508
CENTENARIAN
SCULPTOR JOSEFINA DE VASCONCELLOS
One of the world's most famous sculptors, Josefina de Vasconcellos, a
centenarian who lived most of her life in England's picturesque Lake
District, died peacefully in a Blackpool nursing home on July 20. Until
her final illness she was still sculpting and planning a special Garden
of Peace, to be adorned with some of her statues. To read about her
remarkable achievements, click on JOSEFINA.
0508
THIS
PRETTY BLONDE WILL FALL FOR YOU!
Russian artist and computer wiz Igor Alexeev has presented the world's
web surfers with a truly fascinating game. It features an attractive
animated blonde high-diver bouncing into huge bubbles. When you click the cursor on various parts
of her body, you can make her display her versatility. When she stops,
exhausted, you can fling her into action with a flick of the cursor.
That sounds pretty sexy, but it's not; viewers of all ages will enjoy
it. Just click on
TETKA.
0508
MR.
CHAD AND KILROY LIVE AGAIN
After 60 years in retirement, the world's all-time number one graffiti
subject, Mr. Chad, has been resurrected in England, while in the United
States, where he was known as Kilroy, he may appear on a postage stamp. He's a funny little man with wide-open eyes and a
huge U-shaped nose, peering over a wall. During World War II, this
comical cartoon figure appeared in the most unlikely places around the
world. Read all about it, by clicking on
CHAD/KILROY.
0508
NON-STICK
CHEWING GUM: IS IT REALLY WRIGGLY?
British scientists have at last found a way to stop city
pavements being polluted by millions of blobs of sticky chewing gum.
Professor Terry Cosgrove and his colleagues have won a £12,000 prize in
the University of Bristol’s New Enterprise Competition, for having
developed a new non-stick chewing gum called Revolymer (Revolutionising
Commodity Polymers). To read about this welcome development, click
on WRIGGLY.
0508
SHEEPSHAGGERS' BEER, MANHOLES AND ARMADILLOS
We were pleased to receive a great variety of interesting and amusing
emails as feedback from last month's stories. Julie Bradford, editor of
All About Beer magazine, wrote to us about Shag beer and the shag
dance, Alexander Kholopov (aka Kholopov Trouser) and Natalia Lamanova (aka
Lamana Wooma), founders of the Moscow website Sewers of the World -
Unite! told us about their new stamp project, and Kentucky attorney
Natty Bumppo offered more newspaper slogans. To read these and other
emails, click on FEEDBACK.
0508
NEWSPAPER
SLOGANS BOAST, LIE OR LAUGH
Newspapers around the world flaunt slogans on their front pages. Many
are boastful, some are untrue, and others make us laugh out loud. We've
made a selection from several lists found on American websites. You can
decide for yourself which category each belongs to. To read them, click
on SLOGANS. 0507
PENCIL STUBS ONLINE JOINS GRAYPOW NETWORK
We warmly welcome an outstanding US literary webzine, Pencil Stubs
Online, as the latest link in our Graypow global network of senior
citizen sites. Published monthly, it offers professional
and amateur authors and poets an
opportunity to share their work and creativity, and provides exceptional
reading and entertainment. You can visit the webzine by clicking on
Pencil Stubs Online. 0507MANHOLE
COVERS AS WORKS OF ART
Who would have thought that such mundane objects as manhole
covers would ever be regarded as works of art? A quick tour of the
internet shows that some of the world's great cities proudly display
these essential pieces of road furniture, and encourage artists to
suggest new designs. New York, Paris,Tokyo, Seattle and Vancouver are
all proud of their manholes, which are found with a wide range of
patterns. For more details, click on
MANHOLES. 0507
SHAG
BEER'S NAME SHOCKS MINISTER
The name and marketing slogans of Shag bottled beer have so offended our
State's Gaming and Racing Minister Grant McBride that he has threatened
to ban the sale of the Dutch brew in New South Wales . "I'm outraged by
this product," he said. "To name the product Shag links it directly with
sexual intercourse - and that's not on." Not surprisingly, Mr McBride's
proposed ban has evoked worldwide mirth. We searched the internet for
comments, which you can read by clicking on
SHAG BEER. 0507
ASTROLOGER, 95,
"EXAMPLE TO ALL GREEDY MEN"
Life Begins at 80 salutes an Indian astrologer and
philanthropist, Sri S A P Varadhan, who at 95 still lives a busy and
varied life. One of his admirers calls him "a good example to all greedy
men of the world." To read about this remarkable man, click on
ASTROLOGER. 0507 Spammer
deplores the ice of silence
As a rule, we trash spam emails without reading them, but we couldn't
resist looking at a message headed "Production and supply of all kind
football," which seems to have taken two years to reach us, as we didn't
receive it until June 2005. To read the amusing details, click on
SPAMMER. 0507
COWBOYS,
CHURCH BELLS AND CURTAIN CALLS The US Consul General in Australia, David Hopper, launched
the American Heritage Exhibition in Melbourne on June 7. (You may remember our
story, Americans Invade Australia, in the May edition).
The exhibition, in the Immigration Museum, is called Cowboys, Church Bells
and Curtain Calls, reflecting some of the reasons why an estimated 100,000
Americans have migrated to Oz since the First Fleet arrived in Sydney in 1788. For
further details, read this newspaper report, by clicking on THE AGE.
0507
CANE
TOADS, ARMADILLOS ON THE MARCH
Is global warming the reason why two tropical animal species,
cane toads and armadillos, are migrating to cooler zones in Australia
and America? Millions of poisonous cane toads, originally found only in
Central and South America, are moving south in Australia, while large
numbers of armadillos, once found only in South America, have worked
their way northward through the United States, and may even invade
Canada before long. To read more, click on
TOADS AND ARMADILLOS.
0506
STOP
THOSE RACING SHEEP!
Racing sheep are gaining popularity around the world, as we
mentioned in a recent story. Now we've discovered an amusing way to
stop them in their tracks. All you have to do is visit a BBC Science &
Nature website, place a finger on your mouse, and click the moment you
spot a sheep dashing across the screen. The idea is to test your
reaction time. After three miserable results, we were rated as a bobbing
bobcat on our fourth attempt. Our children and grandchildren were all
much faster. Give it a go, by clicking on SHEEP.
0506
WATCH
YOUR HANDSHAKES! Movers and shakers wanting to clinch a deal in Japan must first learn how to bow
correctly. If you are greeted with a bow, return with a bow as low as the one
you received. Keep your palms flat next to your thighs. It is very important to
remember that business cards should be given after the bow, and are given and
received with both hands. To read similar useful advice for other countries,
click on HANDSHAKES. 0506
AUTUMN
RAIN OFFERS CONSOLATION
Thanks to the internet, what was once a little-known poem has
consoled countless mourners around the English-speaking world.
Unpublished when it was first written in 1932, it touched the hearts of
many people. It was originally circulated among a small group of
friends, who showed it to others, and it has snowballed ever since. In
recent years it has gained wide distribution by email. To read about
the poem and its author, click on
AUTUMN RAIN.
0506
KEYBOARD
KAPERS
Last year we discovered why the letters forming the word
TYPEWRITER are all on the top line of most typewriter and computer
keyboards. You can read that story
HERE. A clever English computer geek, Steve Goodwin, has now worked
out that GALAHAD and ALFALFA can both be typed on the middle line. And
using only the left half of the keyboard, he's found VERTEBRATES and
seven other words, and on the right half, MONOPOLY and HONOLULU. You
can check this out by clicking on
Steve's website.
0506
SOLAR
TOWER MAY BE LESS THAN A KILOMETRE HIGH
In our March issue, we wrote about a solar tower one kilometre
(3280 feet) high - nearly twice the height of the world's tallest
building - planned to be built in a remote part of Australia
appropriately named Sunraysia. "Cynics scoff at the idea, saying they'll
believe it when they see it.," we said. Well, the cynics may be right.
Read the latest report, by clicking on
ABC
NEWS ONLINE. 0506
FREE
ACCESS TO NEWSPAPER HISTORY If you would like to read a newspaper report of any important event
of the last 188 years, you should consult The Scotsman's superb new
digital archive. The Edinburgh paper - one of Britain's best - has made
available every page published since its first issue in 1817. For further
details, click on THE SCOTSMAN.
0505
NORDIC
WALKING: SKIING WITHOUT SNOW We've never seen a Nordic walker in action, but it's claimed that 3.5
million of earnest enthusiasts around the world take part in this strange
activity. Nordic walking is like skiing without snow or skis. All you need are a
couple of poles to help you walk. In America (and Australia) obesity is a
national problem, and Nordic walking is seen as a pleasant way of reducing
weight. To read more, click on NORDIC WALKING.
0505
SOMETHING
NEW EVERY DAY If you'd like to read interesting stories every day, you'll
enjoy visiting the Open Writing website. It offers "a feast of words
from regular columnists, U3A [University of Third Age] writers,
and other authors. Every day there's something new to read in
OPEN WRITING."
0505
ALL
THE WORLD LOVES CHICKEN SOUP "Where in the world do you find chicken soup?" Knight Ridder Newspapers' feature
writer Kathleen Purvis asked last month. "You could just about dip this ol'
planet in soup and roll it in feathers. Translation: chicken soup is
everywhere." She was reviewing Pat Solley's delightful book, "An Exaltation of
Soups". To read this entertaining story, click on
CHICKEN SOUP.
0505
FEEDBACK: QUEENSLAND'S
STRANGE LETTERBOXES Adrian Martin, of Townsville, North Queensland, Australia, has told us of his
encounters with strange letterboxes (mailboxes in US). To read Adrian's
amusing story, click on QUEENSLAND.
0505
All above articles copyright © 2005. Eric
Shackle
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